don't thank me. stop putting your penis in foreign objects.
im having a hard time not telling ppl about ur bathroom story
Look, if he's not the brother with three nipples, I'm just not interested.
They ran through the sprinklers in front of campus police, shirtless. Singing "love is a battlefield"
Well... When your girlfriend fucks your sister, the 2 week courtesy window goes out the door.
I just saw a guy in a sombrero and holding an inflated blow-up doll in all her "glory" get escorted out of the mall. I hate Marley.
she's five days sober.....are those consecutive????
5 days not 5 nights... like a bad hotel/vacation deal
But I wanna cuddle and just put my hand awkwardly close to your penis area by accident and look at you
I wanna fuck that hideous moustache right off your face. get the confetti ready for the festivities
"what's it like being a dancer turned stoner" well, i can change the netflix using my feet mid bongrip, so there's that.
I should have listened to my dad and mean girls... If you have sex you'll get pregnant and die.
Definitely just poured my beer into a McDonald's cup so I could walk through Walmart without judgment. 'Murica.
I fell out of the car while it was moving then got puked on then puked and cried about then got back in the car and puked out the window when we started moving again
there's crying, and people are upset, and there's a love triangle, and a broken heart, and so much estrogen
hey can you send me that pic of that dude?...if this isn't Rochelle's phone...can you please find and tell Rochelle to send me that picture of that dude?
Randomize
