You should never have let annie watch you have sex with other women
THAT'LL be a good time.
and i don't know why my phone always capitalizes that word.
this is a mass text: i just made a grilled cheese with an iron and pasta with the coffeemaker in the hotel room. bow before your new god.
Note to self: Not getting laid all weekend makes girls in mondays classes racks seem enormously bigger.
Man, jail baloney is awful.
I fell asleep to him stroking my ass calling it his precious.
Do you think I should still be the condom fairy for Halloween even though I'll be like.. Almost 8 months pregnant?
We're walking, taxis are a waste of money that can be spent on alcohol.
YOU CAN'T JUST DO COKE AND THEN CALM DOWN
Know what was probably a bad idea? Using white wine as a mixer for vodka.
I wish buying curtains was as easy as buying drugs. I already KNOW what I want and what the outcome will be: awesome.
So, seriously. How does it feel to know that you're riding a cock that was in kindergarten when you were going to prom?
We hooked up last night. I think it was great for our friendship.
I cannot handle Xanax... I just turned my computer on and I googled how to work YouTube
He set the tone in the back of his car by blasting Marvin Gaye's sexual healing before railing me
Randomize
