i was so high last night that i actually googled "how to get un high"
if you ask that question again our friendship is over
I told him I had my daily dose of vitamin c so i wouldn't blow him
You know you're true friends when you can talk about what sexual diseases you may or may not have.
I do not want to do anything. The words more tequila need to be erased from my vocabulary
sorry for allegedly lighting the beer pong balls of fire
So how much of last night are we going to pretend never happened? Enough to stay friends?
We aren't really supposed to respect our bodies til our mid twenties.
your blue lips and tongue was their first indication you were probably underage
HEY THERE IS NO AGE LIMIT ON BLUE SLUSHIES
I threw up for like 20 hours. Im gonna be the DD for the next 5 years.
Whore are you.
Is that a Yoda insult or are you asking me where I am?
Yes.
And then he said he wanted to "get really weird with me on my horse." I took that as he wants to fuck me while riding my horse. Could be a good time.
I woke up with my shoes still on and my pants around my ankles cause I couldn't get them over my shoes
he couldn't get a boner so he asked me to sing you shook me all night long to his penis. I think it was weirder that it actually worked
He just showed up in boxer briefs and loafers with only his phone and condoms
I quit doing blow for him. If that doesn’t say “I’m in love with you and want to marry you” idk what does
Randomize
