8th day he invented the big mac, 9th he invented pop rocks, 10th day boobs.
Girls are like M&M's, once the lights go out you can't tell the difference.
Mid thrust he tells me that we have bio together
i was taking the test and had to adjust my boner and my teacher thought i was cheating or something
Ive been tazing him too get him immuned. He will be unstopable.
You were too busy being proud of your penis shaped pancakes to notice...
I cant. There's fences everywhere and I think I have a boyfriend. Its fabulous.
Cause your way of greeting people at the club was grabbing a tit and jiggling it while yelling a name, which usually wasn't theirs, and guys weren't safe either.
90% sure you snuck in there somewhere, all I really remember is big boobs in my face so I'm assuming it was you.
And for those of you keeping score at home this is the 7th time I've found Casey passed out head first in a bowl of chips at a party I didn't even know she was at
Why is there a condom in the dishwasher...
Well apparently I decided it was easier I piss in the trash can at waffle house than In the toilet. Would've been ok if the trash can was in the bathroom.
Anyway, all that to say that tiny penises are a hassle.
Apparently stoned me thought eating chips in the shower was a good idea.
She made me undress her with my teeth...explains the button in my shit this morning...
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