I'm drinking on the job... HEAVILY
its totally unfair that im just as ill-prepared as a 16 year old but there's no tv show for 25 and pregnant.
I just taped a plastic bag to my ceiling for the next time I have to throw up on the top bunk. Why am I so good at college?
I'm too hungover to crawl to the fridge so im eating the candy nipple tassels I got bought for Christmas
hey this is Madison. you gave me your number last night and asked me to remind you that you didn't fuck anyone. you okay?
i love you man. i hope we fuck some serious shit up this summer.
He bought segways. We ride them when we get drunk. Last night he ran through the sliding glass door.
i was talking to them for like 5 mins and they were like HEY LETS GET A PICTURE and tequila said it was good idea
I immediately regret the tequila decision.
I was weirded out when the chunky goth girl and her boyfriend both started eyeing me and wanted to by me a drink.
Bring me that man meat
Needless to say, I did not go home with him cause he kinda resembled a guppy fish.
the last i saw he was butt naked on the top deck of the bus trying to conduct a drunken choir so i really have no idea
At what point in a new hookup do you tell the guy you need to wear a mouth guard when you sleepover because of your TMJ? Asking for a friend.
so apparantly i made out with 24 santas last night...and an elf...and a stoner
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