But honestly u used to be a cool guy and lately uve been superame(734): Superlame
need another drink. this is the easiest way
If a guy called my cleavage "mesmerizing" but is kinda related to me, does it still count?
I just don't know what he sees in my vagina...and that scares me.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Got a blowie from her in the cab on the way home. Made awkward eye contact with the cabbie who said, and I quote "Keep the mess in her mouth bro", I did so only out of respect
I think sneezing out coked up boogers onto your professor disqualifies you from the "I was sick" excuse
Nautical themed porn is also great bc someone usually wears a captains hat
I just remembered that last night I seriously contemplated swallowing the cap to my toothpaste
He dislocated his shoulder trying to finger me last night if that tells you anything
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
So yeah, my old kindergarten teacher just asked me who gave me the hickies on me neck.
Watching the awkward tinder date at the table next to mine is the most action I've had in months, so there's that.
I wouldn't be able to live with myself if I blew a Trump supporter.
Not sure, she said after cussing out the dentist they called security. Make that the first person I know 86'ed by a dentist.
Just filed for child support I hope he gets the paperwork on Father's Day
So you realized he wasn't actually cheating on you and now you're trying to unfuck things. Or in this case unfuck Tom.
Randomize