yo I sort of want to fuck rachel maddow. but I'm not a lesbian. actually I reaally want to so maybe I am a lesbian. at least on weekdays at 9.
I am pretty sure he just licked my hand while trying to sing goo goo dolls iris to me. Get me out of this state.
Update: Discussing lingerie with my father. He likes sheer black things. Not into the colorful stuff I wear.
and parents always said I was only motivated by money. Pfft they forgot vodka.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
can a guy be partially circumsized? cause i dont exactly know what i was lookng at...
I had a dream last night that I had sex with Abe Lincoln. I must stop watching the History Channel before I go to bed.
I just pull a splinter from the head of my penis. It was a rough night.
By the third Id pass back i figured the bouncer had fucked one of us.
Day #3 of being the only sober person at the bar. This is depression.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I apparently used the line "I'm a bouncer too so i would know if I were too drunk" then they asked me to leave.
Found a phone out last night at the bar. EPIC homemade porn vids on it!
I woke up today in my boxers hugging a log and realized that I think I've gotten close enough to nature. I really need to stop doing shrooms with you
He wore socks while I was giving him head. I couldn't even focus on his penis because of the socks.
You told me I got kicked out of the bar for lipping off to the bouncers... what shocked me the most was that I made it to the bar
You just kept yelling "you ain't got no pancake mix." to the tv screen
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