He was crying to my sister about feeling like a bad person. Then he groped my breasts.
I just saw what sperm look like swimming around. I'm not happy with what you've put in my stomach.
This smoking ban is really fucking with my ability to fart in public
kinda considering buying a life alert for sophmore year
Bath mats should not be used at mops. they don't work. consider this a drunk psa
I really want to know why half of my kitchen floor is missing.
Just walked in on my older brother getting a bj. He told the girl to "keep going" and then attempted to high five me
I sleep with the gay men, they no longer have questions about their sexuality. No strings attached at it's finest and i get new shopping buddies out if it. It really is a win win situation.
You are my idol.
I really think that guy just walks around with tennis balls in his pocket. No dick is that big
He wouldn't let me leave his house until he made me orgasm once for every year I've been alive. The birthday sex song did not prepare me for this.
She yelled "taste the gay rainbow" in a biker bar. She's either brave or fuckin stupid.
I just woke up in my locked bathroom. It's 5 PM. What happened?
My wife climbed on top of me, fucked my brains out, and gave me money from the ATM. I'm living the dream.
I don't think he likes that I'm always sending him pictures of me in my bra but he needs to get it together
He took off all my clothes, fingered me, than said "would you be more comfortable if I was naked too?"
Randomize
