I mean, you're like my second best best friend we're so close I can't believe you'd do that to me
you were crying because peter frampton wasnt your dad
You talked to that cop for like 15 minutes and when you got back, you told us you were "networking".
my mom just asked me why she found a half-eaten burrito in the hamper
I feel like banging her is an expected thing. But banging you would be like getting a 36 on the ACT.
Their car went through the first bag of wine on the drive up...clearly 6 bags was not enough.
Is it cheating if its a threesome? This is more like a party game than infidelity.
Also, I've found a new way to get drunk at work for free. Everytime I make a bushwhacker and there's extra... I put it in a cup. Its the Never ending drink.
Bring the pizza ill bring the boundaries we can cross
Yes... I'll kill two birds with one crazy ecstacy filled night.
but how can he casually chat with my father 8 hours after asking me if i'm a screamer
I finally figured out how to tighten my bra straps and I feel like a god
I don't care if it's 2 inches or 20 I mean dick is dick
I've never had sex that lasts this long though. It's ridiculous. I feel like I need a Gatorade and a sweatband and a sub.
Um, It's tempting but I'm not into coke or farmers.
Randomize
