he said he didn't have a condom.
and you said?
that that's fine cause i was ready to be a mom. yeah - he magically had a condom he forgot about after that.
I feel that the whole multiple orgasm thing is god's way of saying "sorry for the childbirth deal"
she met some random, took his vcard, peed in his bed, left, and then requested him as her boyfriend on facebook
come on don't hate me. your brother looks just like you its almost a complement that i had sex with him.
You always know it is going to end badly when a guy asks if he met you at a "coed naked lawn bowling party"
at what point did you think saran wrap was a better alternative to shoes?
Potato salad is not cupcake ingredient
I'm on a no morals kick. That'll be 3 girls in 24 hours....ending 2011 with a bang
I got a dollar bill stuffed into my bra on two separate occasions by two separate guys simply for having boobs. I feel like somewhere god is patting himself on te back while pointing at me goin "you're welcome dude." easiest two bucks I ever made.
also, the amount of semen in my carpet right now is unforgivable...
I'd tell u there's strippers to make you get here faster, but that would be a blatant lie... There's strippers here.
My gay card got upgraded to platinum status today.
bullshit you weren't drunk, you pointed at me and said my cigarette was empty
I'm planning our wedding on the computer and our threesome on my phone. At the same time.
you asked me how to turn on the ladder
Randomize
