Stop. You don't mean that. Tequila might mean that. But you don't mean that.
if I could go back to kindergarten and not fuck up my life, I so would.
Want to come to my BBQ and Blow party?
She pointed at me and told her friend, I'm going to fuck him, its going to be really loud, so yes, i need the whole basement.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
it's like a replay of two fridays ago...except not in a motel and i'm not having sex in the shower.
id say bad/good trip...at first I wanted to claw off my skin... but then when i tried i ended up tickling myself for an hour.
dude a monday night stripper made you motorboat her. you should get that checked out
is there a way to sugar-coat "shes in jail" when someone is texting me asking where their friend is?
Nothing is better than seeing someone you fucked go to the Olympics. I feel so American.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Dude I sat in the corner of the party bobbing my head and singing danger zone
Apparently today is power bottom appreciation day
The more time I spend surrounded by Mormons, the more I miss alcohol.
I'll give you a blowjob in a Santa hat if it will put you in the Christmas spirit
Ya can’t just go throwing accusations around about someone pooping their pants without some hard evidence
I learned tonight while in another country that no matter the nationality, men are disappointing in bed
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