I wonder how skeet ulrich feels about the skeet skeet phrase and and what it denotes.
I woke up with a picture of my dick as my background. still wondering if it was a good night or not.
My tally is now official: I have been drunk every weekend since 2008. Cheers.
You tried feeding my python vodka through a funnel. Fuck off.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I think I told some stripper my friend owned Groupon Last night
When I was in the bathroom and wiped with a paper towel I found in the trashcan, I realized that this might be the reason I have a yeast infection.
Apple trackpads and semen don't mix. On the way to the Apple Store.
why is my forehead so bruised?
i found you outside knocking on the door with your head because you couldn't lift your arms.
red lips, whiskey sips, shaking hips, nipple slips. my life as a rap song.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
She acts like a 3 year old but with fantastic tits. This girl is the reason women are objectified
I feel like parents watching our children. You want to step in and help them but you just have to let them make their mistakes
The problem with having sex on the couch is that your blanket ends up in the laundry and you're left cold on the couch the next day.
I just spilled my beer on a five year old. She's crying but I can promise you I'm more upset.
I nicknamed her "Jackhammer" for the way she gave me a handjob. My balls were in constant pain
Everybody at Lexi's party found out I'm both a screamer and a moaner after he ate me out on the pool table downstairs. Just another sunday night in Alaska
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