I like it. Barfy the gin-flavoured Assman
Last time I heard from you, you were double fisting strawberry milk and wine. Answer this text so I know you're still alive. Bonus points for a coherent answer.
Such a good question, let's ask the alcohol gods for the answer.
I think the last straw was when you put on ice skates to go across the waxed wooden floor.
Got laid at work. Yes, AT work, why they let me run this tennis center by myself speaks to their poor judge of character.
My life has come to reading articles about dating an ex heroin addict. I'm doing well.
This guy has a theme song for the joints he rolls
And then he said he wanted to "get really weird with me on my horse." I took that as he wants to fuck me while riding my horse. Could be a good time.
In my drunk state I was like I ONLY HAD SEX WITH SOMEONE ELSE BECAUSE HE WAS THE HOTTEST GUY IVE EVER EVEN SEEN
He was smart enough to bring a condom to our study date so I mean I'm sure he'll do fine on the test
you asked the cab driver if he wanted to meet your parents, last night.
I wish I may, I wish I might, get some daddy dick tonight
She meowed at me. Repeatedly. Then she asked what was wrong with me because I didn't understand her.
she squeaked mid orgaism. I laughed she cried
No. No. Fuck you! You can do your own grocery shopping.
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