i'm chasing tequila w mint flavored ice cream, phil's chasing it w cream cheese, bashar's chasing it w pickles...i think we all know who the winner is....
google image searching george stephanopoulos at 1 AM on a saturday night...once again
My morning has consisted of lying in a fetal position, eating a whole tub of ben and jerry's, talking to my cat, and setting all of our pictures on fire. Does that answer your question?
I just found out you can file for divorce online. I love America.
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The foreigner finally woke up and the first thing he did was look up a map of the u.s. His destination is to pennsylvania.
We just saw him running from campus police a few minutes ago. So no, I don't think he's still passed out on the quad.
I woke up with her little sister yelling "she's dead !!" from the bathroom doorway.
i feel like im paying for every hangover i didnt experience last year as a freshman. thank you sophomore year.
It was a legit night tell he threw a snowball in the bar, thats when I knew it was time to go to the next bar.
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Note to self: the judgement that occurs when unrolling your last 5 which was used to snort drugs the night before, to pay for alcohol before noon on a Monday is worth just sucking it up and taking an overdraft fee.
Wait a min, you had drugs last night?!
Yep. It's going to be us, strippers, and drag queens.
A glittery, gay, heavily makeuped, scantily dressed clusterfuck.
Living room floor. I asked him to give me a back rub. He did. And smoothly transitioned that to foreplay, then basically threw me on the floor. My vagina hurts. He deserves another Christmas present.
So when the drug raid cops tell you, you should get out of the relationship, it probably means its time.
So my roommate just came out of the shower with a dude...guess that answers all questions as to whether or not he's gay
My penis definitely considers my Captain Cock costume a success
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