I dont know why I dont listen to you more often. He wont stop texting me. And his signature is "dancing with no panties on"
she just made a shot glass out of magazine paper. I love her.
So I told her I dislocated my shoulder and she said "well okay. I can either be on top or blow you."
Decisions, decisions.
There's a bed on the roof. The window behind it is too small for it to go through. I'm impressed.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
well apperantly i passed out on the stairs shouting "victory".
I'm not sure which one did it but one of them fucked the kink out of my neck
I only want to make out with him. Unless I get hungry. In that case I will take him home and screw him as a distraction from eating.
Chuck job is nothing more than to be my dick stand when I'm too drunk to hold it while pissing
My worst fear almost came to light...I was choking and the cats stared at me like they had no problem eating my face if I died
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Turn on the Discovery Channel
Lets fuck to motorcycle gang fighting
As a gentleman, I asked her if she was sure and she just whispered "wreck me" in my ear. I took that as a green light.
I'd say "I think I gave my TA chlamydia" is an accurate way to sum up my life.
COME AND FUCKING GET ME I AM IN SOME SORT OF JUNKYARD!!!
He pulled out a Plan B pill and handed it to me as I left like it was a party favor. God Bless America.
With each thrust he'd whisper "like a ninja." Should I be flattered or appalled?
Randomize