sometimes i just want to live alone. my roommate keeps looking at me weird like hes never seen a girl eat plain salt before
he wanted to have me eat skittles off of his body. he mad gay sex even gayer.
so she bought me lunch gave me a blowie then paid for the gas since I drove... I think there's a catch but I'm gonna run with it
I can't believe I'm wasting this thong on a guy in a sweater vest.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I bet they don't have a scenario slide on how to deal with a suggested three way with counsel during harassment training.
best. trip. ever. this is going to be too much fun. petland isnt going to know what hit them.
I don't even want to think about the kind of person who would shit in the street before 10pm on a Sunday.
You'd be amazed at how difficult it is to find pics of the helicopter dick
I am very proud of your internet skills
I'm just gonna eat nachos and wine fruit forever.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I'm just that drunk tells people I love them or wants to set them on fire. Accept that.
Oh my god, it's like someone broke the off button in my butthole
I tried to feed the cat bread. I told her it was the body of Christ. That seemed to work.
You don't have a cat...
There should be a guide book that probation officers hand out on "how to tell a tinder girl about your ankle monitor before she notices it at the worst possible moment"
Why can't you just be normal and get dick pics from your exes like everyone else?
You ripped his router out of the wall and screamed "I have defeated the matrix"
Randomize