do you remember how we all fit in that bathtub?
tequila
If I was on drugs, this would be amazing
He passed out drunk on top of me. Fully erect. Still inside me. Woke up like 1 minute later, and continued.
I will never underestimate my ability to drunken ramble. At one point last night i think i was talking about hieroglyphics
just weighed my balls on my pocket scale. that high.
Wow... that's disturbing man, and their not even my balls
dude he was laying on two half-naked chicks, as they rubbed him down with lotion, while rolling a joint. hes like a modern-day african king
He came, while we were making out fully clothed. I'm going to write a book.
OH YEAH AND FORGOT TO THANK YOU FOR THE lack of WARNING THAT HE WASN'T CIRCUMSIZED.
You might not want to come home tonight. Mom just found your vibrator and now she won't stop sobbing and holding a framed picture of you as a little kid.
I told her I named my penis "The Spirit of Exploration." That's all it took.
Are you setting a date to bone me?
Are you accepting?
Because the guy guy doing the drawing either wanted to bone, or wanted us to stop entering the contest. Either way, we got concert tickets so I'm cool with both scenarios.
Want to help me look around town for my shorts from last night?
The parents I babysit for are at this orgy. I need to leave.
Randomize
