Yea. The knew something was up when i told them i had to go pick up goat milk and and and a roasted chicken at 2 am
well I mean we knew we had more drinkers than runners, so we had a "case race for the cure" for relay for life instead of an actual marathon. day drinking and philanthropy. can't go wrong.
I said make yourselves at home, not to put a used condom on my ceiling fan.
Beer bonged 7 shots of Jameson. I title this night short stories with tragic endings.
we hooked up. but it was that weird mix of getting naked and watching Balto that made it so awesome.
I think I should receive an honorary Heisman... I mean, I did sleep with two of the finalists
casually drinking alone with your cats. do they like sparks?
you started looking at my couch laughing and saying to it "she thinks I'm talking to you" then proceeded to laugh and talk to the couch some more.
Yeah...don't think he was sober. He kept screaming "I fucking love this game!". It was his Chase app.
This is three metal detector wands away from being the strangest porn I have ever been in the audience for.
Don't patronize me, I thought of that on peyote, so it was basically like a message from God.
btw, whatever u do, dont try and take that towel away from her..i tried, it got ugly..she said some things im sure she regrets.
I'm just checking to make sure you don't want to go to the farmers market... This is an assumption based on the fact that you were slapped with a sandwich last night and you remained unconscious.
This is even better than the wine from my laundry basket
He's nice to look at and knows the difference between your and you're. I win.
Randomize
