I think I'm maturing; i was gonna watch porn and then take a nap but i motivated myself to put my laundry in first.
question - sack: should she or should she not play with it during foreplay?
she burped and cried multiple times. it was like i was getting head from a baby.
once I found out that a naked stripper wasn't gonna pop out of the cake I kind of just lost interest in the party
21 Ladies Confess The Grossest Things They Do When No One’s Around
We didn't need to cut her off. I'm pretty sure the lit candle she almost drank would have done it for us
We will. we just need a little inspiration.... in smoke form.
Because guys aren't supposed to cry. Especially when it's over a dude singing a Christmas carol.
She's calming us down by shoving oreos in our mouths
Just had a guy try to pull the maraca out of my shirt with his teeth... Wtf
23 Tweets I Thought Were Really Funny When I Was Drunk Yesterday
I just sent Brandon a snapchat where I wasn't wearing a shirt but had a rooster drawn on my boobs that said "cock block" and laughed for 10 minutes I have problems don't judge me
Dude get here. I just re-invented nachos. For real though. They werent real before right now
I'm going to become fluent in fucking Belgian boys
No way hahaha I have zero intention of adding him I wanna just join in on a three some but mostly just be there for moral support and snacks
Never remove your contact lenses after eating an entire bag of spicy doritos.
I woke up in my basement holding someone else's underwear and a bottle of mouthwash . I wish I could explain more than that but i can't remember ...