too bad you live with your parents still
well we can cross tagging a chick in a movie theatre off the list of things to do before we die
And my awkwardness continues. I felt the need to send him a text that said roar. I did it.
It's always exciting to touch a new boob.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Operation Purity has been aborted
his apartment was in a funeral home, walk of shamed through a visiation in the skankiest outfit i own
The poor thing was so drunk they wheeled his motorcycle into the bar. I just dropped him off to pick it up. The best walk of shame ever.
Random question, but did I leave a spoon on your dresser last night?
So apparently, after 11 beers, 2 pitchers of sangria and 3 rhum & cokes, the idea of popping a load of MD and jumping on the trampoline, in the woods, in my underwear was the best one ever.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
why the fuck is there hamburger meat in the toaster. i repeat: WHY THE FUCK IS THERE HAMBURGER MEAT IN MY NEW TOASTER
We have angered the beer gods. It feels like I'm shitting angry cats.
First. I had the strength. Now. I am the death.
1) break up with him. 2) feel bad. 3) fuck some other guy. 4) feel better. Boom! Life plan. You're welcome.
theres a girl in the library eating whip cream out of a starbucks cup... only whip cream, im way to high for this shit
This is why I love being gay. I could never afford that much birth control.
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