and everytime i fart i feel like in your heart, you can hear it
You drank the expired grape juice because you were convinced it had fermented into wine...you have a problem.
Bt dubs, I still have cuts on my arm from when you attacked me with a dildo on Saturday night.
I just put a picture of what I imagine Rob's dick looks like on it on my vision board. thank you Oprah!
Some kid in my class just puked in his backpack, zipped up the backpack, put the backpack on and walked out the door.
Not sure. We'll pass out on that bridge when we stumble to it.
You try staying up all night fucking a guy with a curved dick and see how much you want to go out after that.
Yes. I am getting trashed on an open tab while judging a karoke competition
Impressive. I approve.
Saxophones in my mind. I swear someone dosed me.
LISTEN TO ME! GAY. FIREFIGHTER. They are the most rare and precious kind of gay. The kind little gays dream of. It needs to happen.
I just shit a hot coal. Pretty sure it's that fireball shot from yesterday.
Get drunk. Masturbate to his picture. Fall asleep. Repeat. Fuck summer.
The horniest man in the world doesn't want sex as bad as I want pizza right now.
WHAT KIND OF DEALER ONLY WORKS FRI-SUN???
Ours, apparently.
I refuse to shit my pants for anyone except Cher and Christina Aguilera!
Randomize
