Update, blind date is cute and fun.
Scratch that, blind date just threw up.
remember that time that crown gas station wouldn't sell us a lighter so we had to use matches and birthday candles to smoke with a toilet paper roll? sometimes i miss high school
I've now graduated to the level of gay where I can tell Tegan and Sara apart.
I like when I have the chance to say normal things like 'I know her from college' vs 'I did a ton of blow with her one night at Studio B.'
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Made out with a girl in a wheelchair and rode her around while I was blackout. On a new level.
I was dressed as bob Ross as this occurred
Hold on, I gotta pump breast milk for the white russians.
and then she started to quack like a duck and u started throwing bread at her
Are you high right now?
is that a question or a drake reference?
nothing like smoking out of your roommate's bong with your mom to celebrate the rising of christ
he is risen halelujah
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I wasn't trying to be rude when I hurriedly walked past you, but I can not put in to words exactly how bad I had to shit.
We could all 3 jump out of a cake in just tophats. A true marble cake.
Today's psa: there are certain parts of your body you shouldn't scratch while wearing fake nails.
you just tore your cootch a new one, didn't you?
but seriously, an anthropology paper shouldn't be hard if you're trashed, right?
finals do horrible things to a person. i haven't worn pants since friday
only 4 hours until nug lovin time
excuse me?
nug lovin. lovin nugs.
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