Three words: puerto rican gang bang
Did I miss anything?
A gay irish pirate, a caveman and hunter s tompson.
so we also did drugs
Whatever. I'll let someone else deal with his flacid penis.
We drove past his house blaring "Like a virgin" in the middle of the day. pretty sure he heard.
He is in the front yard trying to catch birds out of the air with a fishing net.
I left my Thanksgiving family dinner puking in my hands from the worst hangover in the world
I don't care if we have to swim home from the bar, Im not gonna sit home in the dark and read some fucking book
True but, who really needs money in europe? Just barter with sexual favors. A bowl of cereal is worth a blowjob.
Nothing says "I mean business" like using a cart at the liquor store.
It wasn't so much skinny dipping. It more like skinny walking...through a fountain.
you stole two subs and a drink from jimmy johns and walked out yelling "get at me bitches"
Well now you know my birthday fantasy: gangbang consisting of men wearing NPR pledge t-shirts.
I may or may not have spent student loan money on a vibrator, that falls under living expenses right?
Plus my parents would be pissed if I spent Thanksgiving in jail... again.
BRB. These cougars are squabbling over my junk and one of them is offering to pay my tuition
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