he thinks he's going to hurt your feelings
He can't hurt my feelings
I don't have feelings.
omg... punch me in the throat... I am about to lose my mind with my parents.. I'm not saying I agree with the menendez brothers.. but I understand
I was high enough to think chocolate sauce on bagel bites was a good idea
I just realized that i have never seen about 30 percent of my friends sober before
like why cant he just admit that he still wants to fuck me even though im underage
i love waking up at 5am with an imprint of a toilet seat on my chest
You stood next to him taking HUGE gasps of air in an attempt to second hand smoke his cig because you didn't have one...
You kept telling me how warm your bag of vomit was and asked me if i wanted to feel.
I should just black out in my front yard again- that was a great nights sleep.
And on that day, Satan said; "Let there be the friend zone and let us get fucking high." while Jesus silently cried in the background.
If I pissed all over some chicks bed I would probably apologize for getting so wasted, not putting out, and turning into a god damn R. Kelly Cinderella... Not ask for coffee and a ride home.
I mean I only got hit in the ass with ONE firework
Also if i get drunk and start crying about the elephants you all have my permission to abandon me.
i just hope we're both dead or in prison at the same time
I wish drug dealers had sales for the holidays
Randomize
