Nothing says Happy Thanksgiving like having to pee in a condom for my cousin so that he can pass a drug test.
gonna sleep on the stairs... to drunk to keep going up, way to drunk to go down, gonna find a comfy spot right here... its safer that way
he seriously made his penis a facebook.
we tried to steal a tractor last night. you should have come out.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Found a beard hair in my crotch.... care to explain?
Came to from my blackout with native american warrior facepaint on I'm too old for this shit
The facepaint not the blacking out
The dingo escaped by eating a hole through my screen door. It's loose in the city somewhere.
he tried breathing fire using moonshine and a roman candle. would not have believed it unless i actually witnessed it.
Miscalculate d the jungle juice, it's actually 10%. Can't taste the diff anyway but my stomcha is warm. Come play pongm.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
You might have to deal with a coked up ex pan American gold medalist wrestler when you get back to the room
His birthday is on Valentines Day, of course he's getting a blowjob
Quick, I need a picture of your dick. Don't ask questions, just show me your genitals.
Here's an unsolicited pic of my tits, because you almost died last night.
Let's get drunk and take out your tonsils tonight
He shampooed and conditioned his pubes but can't manscape for shit.
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