I judge my drunkenness on my brickbreaker playing skills. I'm winning. Suck it.
a kid in a transformers shirt tried to pick me up last night at work. he also rolled up on a bicycle, the kind with pedals. do i look that easy?
I made myself breakfast and everything and then whoever's house it actually was came downstairs very upset.
I only had sex with her cause she looked like jwoww from jersey shore
Ive been sitting around naked watching magic on youtube.
Just an FYI: The offer for you to come snow blow my driveway in return for sexual favors is still on the table
All I remember is him trying to go down on me, but I guess I was too busy making out with his brother
On a lighter note, the guy I gave a lap dance to then fell asleep on his crotch just facebook friend requested me..
I mean two cocks this time. Trust me, I'm not gonna pull the same stunts as last time in this situation
We don't have sex anymore. We both agree that the olympics are more important to watch. All day. Also i don't look good compared to the athletes...
If this first date goes well and I like him, I won't sleep with him. But if it doesn't go well, I'll sleep with him.
For the record, rock bottom is where you start crying during porn because your ex used to slap your ass like that.. Continue on with your day now.
I hate how much more visible my vomit is on snow, I need a winter vomit bush
I have a 30 minute video visit blind date tonight with a guy in prison. And it's costing me $9. ROCK... BOTTOM...
Being forward is somethimes a problems. Like in sexual deity Kong.
I think you’re losing coherence.
I am
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