covered in glitter, my cheek hurts, and theres a handprint on my face. Would i do it again. Absolutly
We better get laid next semester cause I prayed hard
I even walked 30 feet with my eyes closed from two love rocks so that we get some cock
dipping my christmas cookies in kaluha. santa would be proud.
I need some transition time from spring break.. can we day drink between classes this week?
My gynecologist just commented on how well my vagina was waxed
I have realized now that neither the top nor bottom of a bunk bed is safe for sex....
I know everyone screamed lady cop instead of cops. I wanted to apologize to her for our chauvinism
Btw, whenever you feel discouraged about your life, think about me being frantically upset bc my mobile porn site limited me to only 5 videos a day
Man, just talk to her friend and help me out. Otherwise we go home alone
I'd rather jerk off with a hand full of bumble bees then talk to her
The Vegas crew is in two groups, Team Vodka and Team Fireball. There is no winner in this.
I just want a pillowcase full of fast food so I can eat and sleep this hangover away
He said that he doesn't like skittles. This relationship is over an it hasn't even started yet.
I say "glasses of whiskey" like I didn't chug it out of the bottle
Dude what is wrong with me. I'm like a strong independent woman and shit.
Its my nipple ring piercing anniversary. We need to celebrate.