"tonights gonna be a goodnight" was blasting at the club while i was screaming "NO ITS NOT" and crying. How do you think it went?
do you think my med school application would be worse off if "I like helping others and shit" slipped into an essay I emailed last night?
We got blackout for the alumni dinner, and then walked THROUGH the keynote speaker, managing to still say "excuse me".
Then we all started singing, "Our house, in the middle of the street. Our house, fucks a lot of freshman meat". It was magical.
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Seriously, I'm ready to settle for ugly and unemployed as long as he has decent hygene and likes to go down.
He left his shoes, boxers and socks at my house & managed to walk home to his dorm without realizing anything was missing until 3 days after. That's the last time i'll ever hook up with a freshman.
I am trying to think of a way to tell him about thanksgiving and the following weekend in a way that makes me sound funny and exciting and not like an alcoholic
Because of him my new motto is "Keep calm and fuck a guy with a beard". Yes, I am serious.
Witnessing a crazy lady on the bus screaming about how romney is one of the four horsemen of the apocalypse.
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Good luck getting that all cat food off in the shower dumbass
If you keep giving me that glorious dick ill bake you some cookies
Update: pile o Coke party starting at approx 4 - 7 and going until 1ish to celebrate our founding fathers and love of cocaine and hatred of everyone\n
don't worry, i'll dog sit again, the barking made the sex better, its like he was cheering for us, we were just THAT good.
It feels like heartburn in my lungs. I'll buy 2 pounds.
Don’t listen to me, I’m walking around wearing nothing but rave bracelets and headphones shouting “yeeeeaaahhhhhh”
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