Just got my econometrics book in the mail and started flipping through it. Our Thursday parties may turn into u convincing me not to kill myself.
i got really high and listened to the spongebob squarepants theme song and, i swear to god, it was in german.
Hey I never found my wallet but i did find a bag of 14 soft taco supremes
I have your wallet. Trade you for the tacos.
it got awkward when she realized that our nickname for her was "The Hambeast"
I was mid-pee and he walked in, claimed he was looking for his phone, and then asked if we could hook up since we were finally alone.
so yall hooked up?
Or they can chase TEQUILA shots with it. I don't know why my phone capitalizes TEQUILA.
He got me coffee AND filled up my gas tank. He must've fucked another girl in my car..
I just woke up in my ex-boyfriends bed, with my new boyfriends jersey on. I love March maddness.
The closest thing to a sext that you will ever receive from me is a picture of pepperonis on Greg's asscheeks, clenching.
It is. We should just be drunk all the time forever everything is like just 90% more perfect
I'm spending tomorrow with her. What should my ridiculous personal goal be? I've already got a blowjob while eating a cupcake
I didn't realize how trashy of a night we had.
Welllll, you did eat a cherry out of my pussy. So I think that classes it up a little.
Made my roommate send me tit pics so I could send them to someone because I didn't want to move.
Well... I got her number now... I think she is a dish best served drunk
These tits shall not be calmed
Randomize
