covered in glitter, my cheek hurts, and theres a handprint on my face. Would i do it again. Absolutly
You American Chicks are so confusing....1 day you are on my nuts next day you be trippin
Dude its not just American chicks...a small penis is the same in every language
Let's just say there's a reason that "suede" rhymes with "laid".
We pinky-swore to never fuck each other again.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
You sat there for 20minutes trying to seduce the picture of my dad.
Some guy thought i was the waitress and handed me his credit card. drinks on me.
Just realized how sopa could affect my ability to watch porn, son of a bitch
I have a new game. It's called "how weird can you act before a guy won't fuck you". I've deducted most guys are willing even if you're batshit insane.
GO AHEAD, BITCH, GLARE AT MY WAFFLE ONE MORE TIME. I WILL FUCK YOU UP.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I just took the soggiest of beer shits and all i have to eat is shredded cheese and more beer. I need an adult.
Just remembered I said your cat looked delicious last night.
New drinking game, drink every time Rhianna says "Work" in her new song.
I am luring the porn star to my house with chicken!
Dude, the T Swift concert might not be so bad after all. Can you say milfs living vicariously through their teenage daughters? Score.
i can feel my liver failing just LOOKING at that thing
Randomize