we're chasing vodka with high fives
left comments onEVRY SINGLE1of my posts n status updates.Im done dating freshmen
They're here. One showed up as a slutty Crayola, and I think the other came as The Fat Friend.
He told me I had nice tits + they have a great shape. + then proceeded to flatten my boob + show me what the gross tits he's seen look like.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Did you rob me and blame it on the strippers?
YOU ARE OBSESSED WITH PORCHES. I AM OBSESSED WITH PORCHES. HOW IS THIS REAL.
you guys just sat there and simultaneously smoked bowls staring at each other... it was like a bowl off or something.
I took did three shots of fireball and did and handstand. When I stood up some busty slut lead me my the hand down the hall into her dorm room.
But I'm sure your having and "a monumentally better time" repeating the 12th grade
i told her i loved her afterwards and she said "i know," kissed me, and got up to start making breakfast.
dude, she han solo'd you. keep her.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
You know you're doing well in life when weed is considered to improve your job performance
Why did I see a weird snapchat of you barking at McDonald's last night?
2014 decided to stick it to me one last time. Right up the ass.
Her mom came in and passed out drunk on the floor next to us while she was riding me, "it's all good, she does this all the time" is what she said
One door closes, one man cooks for you through the next open door
That chick keeps sending eggplant emojis
Welcome to dating in the digital age. Better catch up now that you’re divorced
and eggplant is code for penis. It means she’s DTF. Go get her tiger!!!
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