i kept saying "bloody hell" in a ron weasley accent until i forcibly told myself to shut up
So i looked up from her cooch and there was her ex-boyfriend
Awkward
I'm sitting here watching a kid lick a basketball- where have i gone wrong in life?
i feel like when youre not in my profile picture no one knows who i am.
the last thing i remember is you screaming lets hunt humans.
is pulling out brownies in the middle of class on 4/20 just too obvious?
Do you have any idea how horrifying it is to hear your sister and her husband fucking then immediately go down stairs only to hear your parents fucking....... I wish I was Hellen Keller right now.
Do you ever wonder what the men who we shamelessly objectify would think if they saw our texts in regard to them?
I'm going through a really dark time right now
I don't want to hear it man. I just jerked it to a pic of my ex wife in a bikini. Buck up
I really enjoy how cavalier you're being about your chlamydia
I'm not going to say what I did. You're smart enough to figure it out. But I did it. And you owe me 20$
Naked. Naked is my favorite color.
I'm doing the walk of shame into my therapists office wearing his clothes...I guess go big or go home
there's a giant awkward home-wrecking elephant in the room. and its name is meg.
i can feel my liver failing just LOOKING at that thing
Randomize
