I'm watching a show called "I didn't know I was pregnant" on TLC...Apparently this happens enough that there is a series
Her tattoo has the intellectual profundity of snakes on a plane except you can't laugh.
It's sad how good I am at giving people diseases
i feel like pocahontas...the disney character not from real chance of love
he is the anna nicole to my 90 year-old billionaire. i'm grateful that he's fucking me, so i'm buying him shit.
it was my 21st birthday. took an old mans walker so i could stay till last call. reasonable right?
I won't be sarcastic... just naked
I took my pants off in the cab and tried to bite his ear. Not going oout for awhile
The stripper had a daughter my age and offered to introduce us. I didn't know what to say to that.
I CAN'T FUCK HIM OUTSIDE. THAT'S FOR PEASANTS. HE'S TOO FAMOUS FOR THAT.
Oh I fucked him, definitely. We played Strip Halo.
My mother expressed her concerns about my drinking via a facebook message.
He's a waste of a perfectly good penis.
I accidentally stubbed my dick
What does that even mean?
i hooked up with all four beatles on halloween get on my level
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