Awww my brother is growing up soo fast!! He just gave me the, "I know you're high but I won't tell mom n dad" look!
Is it wrong to beat off to a girl to determine if you like her or not?
She made me repeat after her: "I take responsibility for what I put in my own mouth."
i just saw someone i know on True Life. i need new friends.
2 am we went back to his house. his mom handed us beers and cooked us pancakes. the next morning his dad had washed my car. i lied. living at home after college definitely does not suck.
She left me a voicemail too. It's just her moaning her name repeatedly
just leaving uw hospital. they thought i had franzia-induced appendicitis. whaaaaat
I'm not drunk because I think my blood just is alcohol from last night so being drunk is sober. If that makes sense
College has done two things for me. Given me the confidence to blow my nose in public and shit in public
They were supposed to legalize it when there was a chance someone might actually propose to me. I'm appealing this bullshit.
I JUST SENT A TOILET SELFIE TO THE WRONG PERSON.
I mean, I already hooked up with her boyfriend. The least I can do is accept her facebook friend request.
I haven’t taken my socks off in over 36 hours. I should add that to my bumble profile.
i told them you weren't like that.. and they laughed at me?
Its safe now. But... Nobody should sleep on my bed tonight.
Randomize
