hook me up with the drugs dog keep up the good work
Peanut Butter and turkey sandwich...this may come back to haunt me
so then you were screaming "GIVE ME KELVINS!" and heating things up in the microwave and no one knew what you wanted
my desire to fuck abstract ideas (bravery, love, popsicls,,) increases by 8bajillion% when I'm high
i'm high and 74% sure there's a monster in my closet
These pubs in Ireland act like hand jobs aren't the universal currency
I just walked by a party bus on my way to study. God hates me.
okay. so this hammed chick got arrested and she keeps trying to make out with the cop. i like her style.
When you give the bridesmaid toast someday at my wedding I need you to quote Ricky Bobby in some form. And slip in your sister has the vagina of awesomeness. That is all.
People were drinking out of 26ers with straws, and somewhere someone yelled "fill me with dicks!" I'm home.
Sorry, I thought I responded to your question. My name is Jon, we kinda had a sleepover at your friends place in OC. Don't know if you remember me, you were "dick chugging" like there was no tomorrow last night.
Stripping out of my teacher clothes to Talk Dirty to Me. Who let me become a teacher?
just saw two eagle scouts making out in chic-fil-a
roommate singing save a horse ride a cowboy wearing a cowboy hat a bikini and jeans while humping the couch.
idk he wanted to trade sex for a triple order of hashbrowns
AND YOU SAID NO?????????
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