Considering the face that your still in jail Im gunna go with no.
I just woke up and realized I puked in my boxers WTF.
You stay classy.
The worst part was I forgot until I tried to put them on.
eh.. i should've known it was headed downhill after he used the phrase "pussy sundae"
what is TOTES MCGOATS in spanish?
finally cleaned my dorm for the first time all year. bleach is awesome.
Is it 3pm? Or am I losing my mind because it's pickled in vodka and diet coke?
All three of them were helicoptering their dicks to persuade me to take my thong off
All of the texts in my phone just say "BEER". I woke up with glowsticks on my arm. What happened last night?
sex on the stairs. not our finest idea.
Yeah sorry about that. I got pulled into the Russian student society's end of term party. There was too much vodka and eurodance to come help you pack.
All I can think of is a mama duck followed by her baby ducks, in brightly colored track shoes.
How high are you?
I, soberly, gave myself a concussion trying to take a pic of my vagina. Fuck you and your hangover.
I am going to be so excited tomorrow when I find this box of crayons in my purse
As he was cumming he yelled "Yahtzee" then said im free to go. Thats my one night stand
Apparently I promised everyone at the party I'd partake in various winter sports with them..
Randomize
