That was rough. We had a 50% puke rate and 100% still drunk rate at lunch
this chick on a show just showed her boobs and let some guy paint them others asked why she did it and her reply i quote "i was bored" why dont chicks get bored more often
I coulnt tell if he was cumming or if I was throwing up
Then she opened the door and pitched the dead squirrel out, yelling "TELL THE OTHERS WHAT YOU SAW"
I got used. This is the happiest day of my life. I was just a huge cock and that is all she needed.
Dude, you sent that text at 9:44 AM. Who thinks of drugs that early?
I JUST ATE A STRANGE BURRITO, I SHOULD NOT BE EXPECTED TO KNOW ANYTHING RIGHT NOW.
Oh boom. You're officially Dr Phil. I need to have sex that I actually remember participating in.
You raged at the rock climbing place for not selling beer and then just said "fuck it" and pulled out a flask.
He simply fell in the fire, rolled out and continued to finish his bottle of vodka. Everyone else instantly sobered up just watching it.
Is it socially acceptable to be blind drunk at half five on a Monday afternoon?
Which pub are you in?
I just woke up in my locked bathroom. It's 5 PM. What happened?
WOKE UP NEXT TO A PLATE OF MEATBALLS HAPPY MONDAY
The married guy I've been fucking broke it off because I'm not a trump supporter and don't share his "traditional values".
Your vagina must be outstanding or have a secret entrance to Narnia if someone is will to fly from Texas for one night of it.
Randomize
