So how come you never look me in the eyes anymore when we make love?
Having kids is risky. They might end up weird.
i'm all for saving the environment, but when we get into the shower to fuck, he shouldn't flip his shower hourglass timer
Dude, 1 prime defect in the snuggie- you can't fuck someone discreetly under a snuggie. No way no how
Girl in front of me has spent the class alternating between playing farmville and the tiffany's website looking at engagement rings. Every once in a while she holds her hand up to the screen.
She doesn't deserve the breathe the same air that we do.
She just bought a cow and we've moved on to looking at wedding dresses.
I am full of burrito and curiosity
when did my "fat clothes" just become my clothes...diet starts tomorrow
I'm not embarrassed about the lap dance. I'm embarrassed for the singing during.
If a video of someone that looks like me banging that chick on the hood of her car in some parking lot suddenly shows up on the web... let me know, I gotta see how that turned out.
All i know is we had 4 people on a tandum bike, and told the cops we couldnt stop because our momentum was so good.
One small step for man, one big gay fierce leap for gays!
he has the ass of a greek god and he made me breakfast
Nothing like a little " am I gonna shit myself " to spice up the work day
Listen, if I miss the flight to Vegas because she's still rimming my ass, it will have been worth it.
i like him enough to wash my sheets.. but not enough to finally get that pink lemonade and vodka slushy stain out of my carpet
Randomize
