Haven't eaten in 11 hrs. I am gonna have so much material to talk about with anorexic girls now
Seriously, I'm delusional. Idk how these models even walk on the runway
Would you object to my putting the bidet video on my Facebook page? It;s awesome.
yo I sort of want to fuck rachel maddow. but I'm not a lesbian. actually I reaally want to so maybe I am a lesbian. at least on weekdays at 9.
Do you ever close your eyes when your having sex with your girlfriend and pretend she didn't get fat after high school?
we got a new version of the plan b at the pharmacy now. its called next choice. you would think they would come up with better names for these things.
She got her phone back last night. And the first thing I sent her was a picture of me pooping in a culvers bathroom
do you think women who transgender themselves have the option of getting a circumcised or an uncircumcised dick?
I need to get skinnier so that I know when pregnancy scares are real...
Just came out of my room at 8 AM to find 2 pounds of raw hamburger and a half eaten cake strewn across the hallway. And I'm not surprised at all.
I can only get completely wasted and hungry two more times and then we're out of fritos.
I want the address of the individual responsible for strawbeeritas. I want to send them gift basket.
He told me that when he bends me over that chair I remind him of a bull rider. So thanks for being the ex that helps my present sex life
hotelroom bed is big enough to masturbate in, but small enough to not want to sleep in it after you've masturbated in it
Im so fucked up I'm drinking baileys and coffee just to stay awake.
It's 6 in the afternoon?
he's single and there are thong briefs.
Randomize
