I just told the 2nd grade class leprechauns are the children of midgets.
now I regret adding my aunt on facebook. she remnded me today on my wall about the importance of checking my stools for blood since I have diaherria.
I've decided that my new worst fear is that I'll end up on "I Didn't Know I was Pregnant"
my momz letting me make the christmas card in photoshop
so that means christmas in space?
imma make our dead cats ghosts like obi wan kenobi
Hey couldn't find water bottle to put margs in whole bottle in purse gonna stop and get cups and ice from starbucks and burrito from una mas want a quesadilla
On 3 separate occasions, she grabbed my bullhorn to announce to the entire party she had fucked me.
for a while, i completely forgot that you wrote "fuck me" on my stomach before we went out. when he took my shirt off that night, he just looked down and said, "may i?". i think i'm in love
Walk back down Church toward Mass Ave. Take a right and head for the guy in a kilt on top of the really tall unicycle. C u soon!
I suggest absurd amounts of masturbation this weekend to build up the necessary calluses
It's Breast Cancer Awareness Month!!!! What random hook up should check my tata's this year?!?!
Don't blame me. My vagina leads me astray.
I still don't know why she was so offended when I emerged from the bathroom and told her my balls were now clean.
Seriously, why do I have a mortar round?
I just want a relatively mentally stable guy with tattoos and facial hair that loves Captain America as much as I do and will fuck me the way I deserve to be fucked, is that too much to ask for?
Lobby closes at 2 AM on Thursday, but everyone walking still wants food... I could run a "Taco Bell Taxi" when I clock off at 2 and charge a dollar to give drunks a ride through drive thru.
Someones thought of a way to afford tuition.
Randomize
