This girl in my class is wearing a sweatshirt that says "LEAD ME NOT INTO TEMPTATION" ahaha I almost just laughed out loud. We could never be friends
There isn't a single transaction on my online bank account that doesn't involve drugs or alcohol since November 12
Well I'm glad to hear the fight wasnt over his small dick.
i wrote down the address for planned parenthood on the back of the receipt for the condom that broke
Do you think flip cup during wine tasting is a bad idea? They're perfect flipping cups...
Bring my lunch to work in liquor store bags is doing nothing for my career
The chips are stabbing my teeth, and I can feel the muscle under my mouth contracting.
He said he wanted to make me his Twinkie, "filled with his delicious cream." ABSOLUTELY 100% NO YOU MAY NOT REPEAT ****NOT**** GIVE HIM MY NUMBER EVER EVER EVER. Please confirm receipt and full comprehension of this message.
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I just think that if you're going to run around naked outside, a feather boa should be involved. Half for the flair and half for an emergency cover.
"I vaguely remember the Health and Safety Inspector walking into my room this morning while I was passed out naked. That's one way to get it over with quickly."
Naked. naked and bneed help.
Black labs can get you to do pretty much anything...even approach strange men in their bath robes
ya I went to the grocery store literally just for cheese and condoms
I only have sex with you to have a memory to masturbate to.
Randomize
