I missed Saved by the Bell this morning, but Ashley in a later episode of Fresh Prince is keeping the morning wood alive.
The other night after we fucked we talked about Lowe's vision insurance. Never fuck a coworker.
i woke up next to a ladle and a packet of chocolate biscuits that my face had melted into one giant biscuit.
I'm so glad I got to use the word gutterslut before 11:00a today.
My goal is to upperdeck the house I'm at, because it's some girl I don't know's birthday. Welcome to adulthood, bitch.
Dont really know what happened near the end, Pockets were filled with skittles though
hand jobs are a waste of time that only lead to arm cramps. Also, where do you look...his eyes, at the penis, at the tv?
yeah the "where to look" question is super awkward
He is really real. Like I know where he works, have referenced him with mutual fb friends and I've seen his dick. He's real.
So for St Paddys day I colored my junk green and got a little hat for him....wanna see it before I sober up....
I stole a tiki torch last night and just returned it. Things have been better.
The way I see it, there's 2 types of friends. Those you should do drugs with, and those you really,really shouldn't.
Atleast we had sex on the couch before your ex took it from you
You use your abs way more than I realized. Btw multiple orgasms is the best thing I've ever discovered.
She won't let me meet her hot new boy toy just because she thinks it'll lead to us having a threesome. It's not fair. I thought we were friends...
Well the grass always *looks* greener on the other side but sometimes that’s bc there’s a sewage runoff...
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