With the amount of g's you put on going I'm gonna guess you're drinking alone again
Her fucking playlist had randy newman on it. It was like woody was watching the whole time.
She's drunk as hell locked up I. The bathroom with my shoes where do I go from here
I've decided I'm going to drink again. More. Day drinking. Night drinking. Everything. It's the responsible thing to do since I'm not pregnant
We hit a deer while we were singing an acapella version of "I will always love you"
lets do drugs on my lunch break tomorrow
That guy was drunk and couldn't get it up so he just tried to scissor me.
You're seeing with your vagina, not your eyes.
I'm way too hungover for life right now
My phone just put together a highlight reel of yesterday's dick pic session, set to music and everything
going on fb and having 11 notifications all from you is absolutely horrifying
If I ever drink whiskey again make sure I don't eat the plastic cups that I'm drinking them from.
Do u think the bouncer will let me in with a giant stuffed snake?
this is the second night in a row i've fucked a guy i met on craigslist. and it wasn't even a post for sex. i posted a housing ad. A HOUSING AD
So my step mom just informed me she tells stories about me at work as a form of birth control for the girls that work there, not sure if i should be offended or proud.
Randomize
