just do it
fine only cuz shes asian
i bet jesus would rush if he went to usc
...So a 6 ft tall drag queen in heels I would kill for just told me I have a dunkable ass. I'm confused...but I'll take any compliment I can.
My life is like the prequel to "40 Year Old Virgin"
Holy fuck. She looks like Vin Diesel's stuntman
puking up blue gatorade is not as nearly as much fun as it sounds
im just glad that if you were going to have awkward hospital sex, you would want it with me
I don't know. I guess at the end of the day I wanted taco bell more than a boyfriend.
Totally get that.
Every pair of shorts I try on makes me look like some kind of powerful lesbian wizard.
That is like, the point of shorts
The fact that I'm going to be living with you is starting to make me worry about my heatlh.
Ya that ship has sailed dude
Whoops. I'm a horrible gf, I dropped the "I'm looking for jobs in a different city" bomb before I wished him a happy anniversary
We were making fun of some people having sex on the beach, an hour later we were having sex on a golf course
i like him enough to wash my sheets.. but not enough to finally get that pink lemonade and vodka slushy stain out of my carpet
i think we reached that point in our drunkenness where even the creeps found us intolerable
Sorry about kicking you last night but you don’t mess with a girls margarita bucket. Ever
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