Why do I feel like I'm not the only one drinking to make my night class teacher look better?
Okay, quick math test. If our entire group can do at least 6 shots a night, how much alcohol will be needed to keep us shit faced for the rest of the week? This is for a grade. Anddd, go.
It was like the titanic mixed with those sad puppy commercials mixed with jello shots
My drug dealer is making me hot tea during the snowstorm...I'm a fan.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Sometimes things go your way and sometimes you get hit on by a fat drunk girl.
(540): I ran 10 miles and then took a dump behind a rock. What the fuck have you done with a hangover that's comparable?
These welts and bruises from letting gay boys whip my thighs last night are a clear indication i should lay off the tequila.
If we accept the love we think we deserve do we also accept the sex we think we deserve?
Get the cougar, get the cougar, get the cougar. Act like an injured baby deer. She will either eat you alive or nurse you back to health either way its still sex.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I cannot be with a girl who won't let me come home on my lunch break, eat spicy ranch and watch Breaking Bad without pants on. #lesbianproblems
Also. I think I just got sentimental over a nude
How weird would it be to ask your bro to 3d print your dick for me
i got kicked out of the casino for drunken disorderly conduct because i kept stumbling into old people and one of them told on me. as the boucer was taking down my information so i could no re-enter i ripped my id out of his hands while yelling fuck you.
I had a dream I hooked up with Post Malone. I can still smell the dream
I’m lazy so obviously looking like a rotisserie chicken is my favourite position
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