I'm in new territory... I've never had to convince a guy to let me give him head as an apology.
At what point did we agree that playing bocchi ball on the way to the liquor store was a good idea?
I think you blew it when you asked her "Do you look good naked too, Or is it just the bra?"
I showed remarkable dignity in such a compromising situation. Except I came off as sort of a blue ball giver.
I would like to apologize for asking to take advantage of you, wishing you a horny Hanukkah and whatever "abd ethw prnym to mzbe yur penis cna be friends" means.
I can't think of anything besides pubic hair fallout. Ugh.
can you come back were all locked out and alyssia's still inside passed out on the floor but more importantly i left a beer in there that's not finished
I just can't have sex with a guy who has nicer eyebrows than me
The bartender said he wanted to turn you gay, and we got free shots the rest of the night
Put it this way, at one point I was getting stoned on the roof of the strip club with one of the strippers while another one gave me a free lap dance. That wasn't even the best part of the night.
But for real though. That weed tastes like the jolly laughter of Santa Claus.
Nothing says Happy Holidays like sending a picture of your ass to the wrong manager.
anyone can pick a bar fight and pick up a waitress at a bar, not everyone hangout with two wolves. TWO WOLVES.
I woke up at 2 AM to find them in my living room with a radio flyer wagon full of milk glass plates and a Holstein cow. How am I going to explain this to my landlord!?!
I woke up with my my shoes on and pants half way off and missing 60 dollars. Please please please tell me you saw me last night.
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