I wanna come home
And do what?
Kiss. Rip clothes off. Repeat.
why the FUCK would i wear makeup on my vagina!?
Apparently I think casual Friday means I can show up unshaven in yesterday's clothes and reeking of booze.
I just saw a guy in the gym riding the bicycle while watching baseball and dipping.
17 year olds will be the death of me.
I am still STD free so as far as I am concerned I never went to panama.
I just accidentally showed an old lady a pic of my penis while showing her cat pics. So how's your day going?
My old dealer would be proud of the drug cocktail I just took for my back pain.
So you'd go straight for a fat chick with cheese on her tits?
Yes.
You were carrying a 6 ft lamp that we stole on your back yelling "OHANA MEANS FAMILY AND FAMILY MEANS NOBODY GETS LEFT BEHIND"
Omg this place. I'm at a neighborhood party. My mom has kissed two other moms. Where am I
Well I'm over here squandering a fabulous hair day and radiant complexion
He was like 120 lbs and 20 of that was penis
i got kicked out of the casino for drunken disorderly conduct because i kept stumbling into old people and one of them told on me. as the boucer was taking down my information so i could no re-enter i ripped my id out of his hands while yelling fuck you.
What, That's like a total 7 inches of cock and 6 are from Joe. Don't be mad at me because you had the lamest orgy ever.
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