Obv we're gonna bbm each other in bed
Sorry I totally forgot to text you back. When you texted me I was at work at the pharmacy and it was stupid busy. And then of course I had my 8 hour "shoot me b/c half of Loyola comes in to buy plan B" shift.
Im partying with a unicorn. You don't even know.
you started crying about dinosaurs being extinct
that's why i woke up holding that dina girls hand
she's a dina-saur
She had a maple leaf tattoo behind her ear and told me she liked my "playoff beard".
Only in Canada would your laziness be applied to hockey and rewarded.
come over, blizzard of oz party. dress up.
lets just say that i have already today: gotten drunk, got in a fight, got stranded an hour away from home, found a ride, sobered up, and slept. woken back up, and here i am. its been a long day. Day drinking is bad for friendships.
We are there now. They have a giant cock and balls with an eagles face and wings.
All I know is that I'm not gonna send out SOS messages via twitter for your rescue this time.
We have to have sex twice when i get back. I miss you sex, and thank god the nhl lockout is over sex. I will happily let you wear your sharks jersey during it and i will wear my ducks jersey, and it will be mad rivalry sex.
Take a shit and have a hit. It's the Sunday Funday Rule.
He tried to buy me a drink at dollar beer night. All 3 of his credit cards were declined, so he asked me if I could cover it. Needless to say, I'm not calling him back.
When she says 'Polish hangover cure' she just means more vodka. Don't do it.
She's gonna be mad if she finds out you put weed in her house warming cookies
We need a signal or code word for "I basically shaved my whole body and we should touch each other tonight".
Randomize
