when my dick couldnt get hard she said "fly on little wing"
franzia sundays are my new favorite holiday
i'm watching the draft and making cookies. how am i still single?
How much explanation does bbqsexapalooza need?
we walked in to her beating him with a broom while he was trying to sweep ramen into a box. there were packing peanuts everywhere.
i've hooked up with him and three of his roommates and not a single one of them knows about it..think its safe to say i found the silver lining in a boys inability to communicate
rumor has it I kept asking you to go to the "tall grass" with me...sorry about that.
She keeps telling me I can't keep feeding the dog my food. I gave half the weed brownie to the dog and half to me. I just want it to taste the greatness of cheezits like I am.
You're fucking beautiful as shit and we should have loving sex...
As the bouncer was escorting you out, you yelled "keep your filthy dick beaters off me!"
I sleep texted my mom and asked her for a condom last night
HIS BALLS ARE HEAVEN SENT FROM THE VELVET ANGLES.
He said he could outsmoke me so I challenged him to a weed duel. I don't always very competitive but when I do...
I think the biggest problem with being overhigh is when the kitchen was on fire and I was pointing and laughing and eating rootbeer oreos like it was fucking Ozzfest 2000
Dick is dick. I’m not turning it down because he’s younger than me. Covid has been a real cockblock and I’m a woman with needs
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