You were pissed we didn't change the movie to Eurotrip so you kept singing "Scotty Doesn't Know" over and over until you passed out.
Yeah I'm about to go down a waterslide that comes out a 2nd story window. I love college.
she's sitting here naked with heels and a taco.
Its name is Richard. And I think he formally introduced us.
could hear acupuncture therapist getting blown in the next room over the whale music
i'm just sitting here watching hocus pocus, eating takeout, and taking self esteem quizzes online while everyone is out partying. you tell me how my night is.
If you wondered to yourself today, "did Sarah break her bathing suit strap and flash a pool full of children," the answer is yes.
Every part of me is in agreement...but mostly my vagina
I just saw a black chick with an eyepatch. This is a once in a lifetime opportunity.
The bottle of Jameson may have been a bit aggressive for a Sunday cookout.
True freedom is running around a sex club in former power plant in Berlin wearing a boots, a jock
I still can't believe that I ate McDonald's off of my chest in his bed...
Cross faded me is not the classiest.
No not at all haha I wish there was a picture of that
It's like fucking tetris in this bed
If only I could bank my drunk hookups for a sober IOU.
Should I apologize to him for saying I wanted to punch him in the face as I was digging through the trash?
Randomize
